Thursday, May 25, 2006

The Flea Takes Letters

Dear Mr. 23

What do you think of Bush?

Bush hater 28

Dear Mr. 28

Please don’t call me 23. That is not my name. It is a designation that indicates I’m from the 23rd generation of fleas that entirely skipped the evolutionary process. Anything Scientists don’t understand, they call it evolution. You say, "How’d things come to be this way"? The only thing they can say is "Duh, I don’t know. Must be evolution".

Now to answer your quesiton. If you’re asking me what do I think of Bush, the answer is yes. If it weren’t for the Bush on fire, nothing would’ve gotten done in Egypt. If it weren’t for the Bush on fire in Washington in 2001, nothing would’ve gotten done there either.

But if you don’t clarify your next question, I won’t give you either one of those answers.


Dear Mr Flea23

Is this the right way to address you?

Bush Hater28

Dear 28

Actually, I haven’t earned my name yet. I’m only 2000000 years old (no commas please). I won’t say my name until I reach 500000 years old.

P. S. Why do you call yourself a Bush hater? Why not call yourself a Tree hater? Some people just hate anything they don’t agree with.


Dear Flea 23

I hate you

Flea23 hater. (Formerly known as Bush hater 28)

Dear Flea23 Hater (AKA Bush hater 28)

I’m glad to see you’re making progress. I’ve moved you from being a Bush hater to a Flea hater. Don’t be nervous about that. It’s O.K. We are professionals here. Let me speak very, very slowly. Como Se Dice "Slowly". Now listen carefully. Most people hate fleas. This is perfectly normal. Don’t worry about it.

P.S. We are tightning the security around my house.


Dear Flea 23

Can you be killed?

Flea Hater

Dear Flea Hater

I’m glad you asked that. It’s a good question. The 23rd generation of fleas can only be killed with a flea gun. You see, most weapons that are used against us are too big. Any man made weapon therefore won’t work. It would have to be something small enough so it can pierce the heart. There are few animals around thata could accomplish such a feat. We do have a small heart, you know. We have less blood than a drop of blood has. In fact, a drop of blood would drown us.

P. S. Why do you want to kill me?


Dear Flea23

First you, then Bush. He he he.

Flea hater (AKA Bush hater)

Dear Flea hater (AKA Bush hater)

You don’t want me to call out the Floo. When Floo drops on you, you’ll wish you were dead. Need I say more? Get a life.


.................I could not bring my passions from a common spring........

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